iPerfect
by emeralddusk
Summary: Sam's always so mean when she talks about herself.


Growing Up imPerfect

_You took a wrong turn...once or twice_

_You dug your way out...blood and fire_

Sam sat alone in her bedroom, thinking of the horrible things that happened last night; but she made it okay; her mother wouldn't hurt Melanie any more because of what her sister did.

Rubbing the raw bruise on her arm, Sam accepted the responsibility she took on; the victim.

_Bad decisions...that's alright; Welcome to my silly life._

At school, teachers yelled, kept showing Sam bad grades, and saying she didn't have a future; right now, though, she wasn't thinking past trying to not come home tonight. She'd gotten into fights; her mother was mean enough to her and she didn't need more of that from other kids. Melanie never got in trouble, though; she was always so perfect-acting at school.

_Mistreated..._

Pam thrust her fist into Sam, making her soft cheeks burn and sending her onto the floor.

_Misplaced,_

_Misunderstood..._

Sam sat up crying one night, fell asleep at school, got yelled and screamed at by the teachers laughed at by the kids, and was called lazy. That's how they saw her. After that, everyone lost respect for the girl.

_Miss, "No way, it's all good."_

"Sam, is everything okay at home?" one of the teachers asked one day, making him the first person to actually care about the poor child.

"Yeah, I'm good," Sam answered with a fake smile. "Thanks." Telling a teacher would just make Melanie more upset, and tick off Pam.

_It didn't slow me down_

_Mistaken; Always second guessing_

Walking down the sidewalk to that horrid place she and her sister had to call home, Sam quickly shot her head back, expecting something to attack her; she was becoming more and more afraid by the day.

_Underestimated; Look, I'm still around._

"Who is that girl?" Missy asked another student in the hallway. "That's just Sam Puckett," the kid answered, thinking nothing of it.

Sam looked at the two for a second, kept her pain and sorrow; her feelings of being left out, all to herself, then kept walking.

_Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever-ever feel..._

Sitting at a table in her study hall class, the blond girl quickly wiped away a tear, then returned to her work.

_Like you're less than...Less than perfect._

Looking in the mirror, Sam spent more time brushing out her hair. Even after so long, she found no satisfaction with herself. Finally, she folded her lips in to form a sort of frown, gave up, and walked away.

Holding Melanie, Sam didn't notice herself stop worrying about her own problems and start turning into a stronger sister than she could ever be.

_Pretty pretty please, if you ever, ever feel_

_Like you're nothing, you are perfect..._

_To me_

Leaning upward, Melanie kissed her beloved sister on the cheek, then settled her head into her shoulder. Sam kept her twin close, moving her arm over Melanie's shoulder to act as a blanket to keep her warm and calm in the cold night. Pam wasn't home, so the two were left to fend for themselves, as usual. At least this way, they were safe.

_...You're so mean..._

_When you talk about yourself; you are wrong._

In those rare occasions when Sam couldn't stop herself from crying, Melanie always found out, wiped away every one of her sister's tears, then told her how beautiful and wonderful she was.

But Melanie wasn't there during the school day, and there was no one to make Sam feel better; only worse. She didn't cut herself anymore, because it made her feel too different from Melanie and those she loved. Besides, Carly Shay, who might have been the teenager's first and only friend, all but begged her to stop.

_Change the voices in your head..._

_Make them like __**you**__ instead._

Sam, Melanie, and Carly sat together, and found happiness for a short time, before Pam chased them all away. Then, Sam went back to hating herself again.

_So complicated..._

_Look how we all made it;_

_Filled with so much hatred,_

_It's such a tired game._

Soaking her body in cold water, Sam felt the wounds start to numb, and her body start to break out in goosebumps. Melanie sat her down so many times, telling her that "Sam Puckett is the most amazing, sweet girl in the whole world," but it still didn't make her feel any better. But then again...

_It's enough,_

_I've done all I can think of;_

_Chased down all my demons, I've seen you do the same._

Sam felt the warmth and love her mother should have given her since the very beginning when she, Melanie, and Carly hugged; no one had ever cared about the two before. Sam learned from Carly, even though she was too afraid to tell her; she learned how to ignore and forget about the horrible things people said to her, learned how to start looking at her inner beauty, and learned that her problems didn't have to stay inside of her. Melanie kept the same lessons inside of herself, but she didn't know how to teach them to others (no matter how much she wanted to).

_The whole world's scared, so I'll swallow the fear._

Sam told Melanie when the two were very young, "You don't ever have to worry. I'll do all the worrying for you...I'll be the one who looks out for you." That night, Sam cried.

_We're so cool, in-line, and we try, try, try._

_But we try too hard; it's a waste of my time._

_Done looking for the critics, cuz they're everywhere; _

_They don't like my jeans, they don't get my hair._

Carly, Sam, and Melanie walked down the hallway, towards the light leading outside. Everyone seemed to have their comments and opinions about them, but they weren't listening anymore.

_Estrange ourselves, and we do it all the time._

_Why do we do that?_

_Why do I do that?_

The following day, Pam wasn't woken up by the sounds of her daughters, then came downstairs to find nothing more than a note;

"Dear Mom,

Hope you don't miss us. I'm sure this'll be easier on you. Sorry we couldn't make you happier. Goodbye.

-Sam and Melanie"

Holding one another's hand, the three girls watched the sun set over the horizon of Seattle's skyline.

_You are perfect..._

_To me_

Sam and Melanie took comfort in one another, and knew that no matter what happened, they would be sisters, and Carly would always be their friend.


End file.
